- I've never been this drunk before! Twenty-four times.
- I feel so sick! Seventeen times.
- Why do I feel so sick? Seven times.
- I think I'll die! Twice.
- I'm almost sixty! Once.
- I want to be your friend, but not this bad. Twice.
- How do you live like this? Once.
My dad had to get his own dinner, since I "went to bed" when she got offensively drunk. And then I had to get up and make sure he got dinner and make sure the cats got their ear mite meds, and make sure I got dinner, and help her throw up and make it to the toilet, and take Immodium. Yum!
Keep tuned for the morning after! She's lined up for a doozy, and she'll be sick all day if I'm any judge. And it's not yet nine! I may still decide to get drunk, in which case she's in for a long morning of getting herself taken care of all on her own, just like I do. In fact, I think I may go get a six-pack. Mmmmm. Justification.